He's here!

So obviously my lack of blogging has been because... A small person has emerged from my minge!

My birth story is nothing spectacular, basically I had funny pains on Wednesday morning, they got regular enough for me to cancel lessons at the school and to consult dr google to see if they were real but not serious enough for me to tell Ryota to come home from work and just ended up calling the hospital who said I should just come in for a check anyway seeing as though I'd had balloon open up cervix and all, baby might fall out and that would be just messy...

So went to the hospital around 2 in the afternoon and had contractions all afternoon but nothing that I couldn't handle. At about 7 o clock they said I was about 6cm dilated and it would probably be after midnight which just wasn't what you want to hear but can't be helped I guess. The contractions got a bit more painful as if my body was hurrying up to get it over with and Ryota chose this time to go to the conbini because he was hungry... While he was out the doc came in and said "are you tired? Should we just get it over with?" Brilliant display of Japanese efficiency, I was like, "yup, let's do it!" they broke my water and after that it was all go, 30 minutes later and I was in absolute agony groaning like some kind of wild animal and gripping the rails of the bed with such force they shook violently every time a contraction came.

Ryota just made it back in time, chomping on his bread, bewildered at how fast things were happening. After I got the urge to push it's all a bit of a blur but I remember the nurse telling me not to push yet and me telling her to piss off because trying not to push when you have a giant head bearing down on your minge is possibly the hardest thing I've ever had to do. After they had everything in place and and the doc had come to oversee things they told me I could push and I remember the strict but nice nurse grabbing my hands and saying "vinegar arrow San!!! Look at me! Now push!!!!!" If it hadn't been the worst pain of my life I probably wold have laughed. They then told me that they would be giving me the snip and I was all for it, rather a clean cut vagina than a ripped one to my bum hole, I don't remember him cutting me but Ryota said he almost vomited when he heard the 'snip snip' sound it made. Lovely.

After the chop he came out in about 3 pushes, which was surprisingly lovely considering it took 4 hours of that shit with Ash. After he was out and I was all sewn up I felt brilliant, even stole Ryota's bloody conbini bread from him and noshed on that!
After everyone except my mother in law had left (Ryota planned on going to work the next day, fucking Japan!) I experienced something worse than the fucking birth, I couldn't stop shaking, and I'm not talking little tremors, my whole body, every fucking muscle was violently shaking, the worst was my jaw, my teeth were a rattling together so much that I was either biting my tongue or at risk of breaking a tooth, I've never experienced anything like it. The nurse didn't quite know what to do the silly cow so they called the doc and he said I'd had an infection and would probably get a high fever after the shakes stopped. So I stuck a towel in my mouth and waited it out, and sure enough after about 30 minutes panicking that I was going to die, they stopped and I got a 40 degree fever. Was not pleasant but I wa lying down and they gave me some pain killers so not too bad.

Baby boy had a bit of a fever too so they had to put him on an IV for 3 days, but he's fighting fit and sucking down boob at a pace that's hard to keep up with!
We came home on Sunday and this week has been a bitof an adjustment, but we're all doing well and getting our groove!

So here he is!



Making his blog debut! Bailey Kaion Vinegar Arrow! (酢矢ベイリィ海音)