Money Money Money!

Horrible stuff. Damn shame I enjoy spending it so much actually.

I have a thing with money... I HATE tightarses, it's the one (and only?!) thing that Ryota is my dream man with. He's not tight, he doesn't gamble and he lets me handle our money. Just the way I like it. I think it's because my Grandad was an absolute tight cunt with money, it made me actually call him a cunt once, like to his face, an old man!! That's another story though... Point is, I hate people who are tight with money, that said, I'm not a waster either and I just hate any situation that gets awkward when it comes to money I guess.

My family are great with money, we'd all give it to each other in a second and there's no weirdness, if we need it we ask, if we can give it, we do. Pretty simple. Or so I thought...

But no, not in Japan!

So here's the story, can't remember if I've written it here or not, but while I'm working, Ryota's sister, formerly known as 'dog-fucker' and currently just known as 'fucker', is looking after Bailey for me. It's a big help, but I pay for that shit, so for me it just evens out, I don't feel the need to lick any arseholes for the favour and I like it that way. So the arrangement was: Any lesson that I worked when Ryota wasn't around to look after him, I would pay her ￥1000 a lesson. Which isn't minimum wage, and isn't a fortune, but pretty damn reasonable for a job you can do in your pyjamas I thought. Now the fact that Bailey sleeps a lot in the day (and hardly at all at night!) is irrelevant, it does piss me off however. Now the school is open from 9am-8pm but I don't work all those hours, which is why we made our arrangement by the lesson. Ryota leaves at 8am and gets home at 6pm, so to me I thought that I would be paying her for any lesson that I worked between 9am-6pm. And it was working well I thought! It was an average of ￥90,000 a month for her, not bad right!? More than I would be paying even for private childcare but I have Bailey with me when I'm not working and I can still breastfeed him, which I wouldn't have been able to do otherwise.

Today I gave her ￥15,000 for the week because Tuesday was a day off and I'd taken Ash out for his birthday. Now I'm not sure if there was some confusion if I was supposed to pay for that day too but mother-in-law was all, "Oh I think you've made a mistake Corinne!" And it got kind of awkward because although they'd taken Bailey for the day for me so I could have some one-on-one time with Ash for his birthday, I thought that was a favour... And I was like... "Ohh but I didn't work on Tuesday..." and just kind of trailed off, I really need more balls but I'm quite Japanese in this kind of situation. But I think they genuinely forgot about it so it was fine, but after a few hushed whispers later, mother-in-law said: "Are you going to pay for the lessons from 6pm-7pm because Ryota is never here...??"

Fuck off.
 Sorry, but it kind of annoyed me, firstly, fucker didn't say it to my face, had to run to mummy to say it for her, and honestly, I'd rather pay a professional to watch my kid without the side of guilt!! So I payed it, because it's true, Ryota gets home at 6 and could technically watch Bailey but he usually goes running has a shower, which I don't begrudge him, but when it cost me ￥1000...? Maybe I'm really being petty but as I understood it, that extra hour would be a favour to Ryota and really nothing to do with me, but apparently not. So Ryota said to fucker "Don't be a cunt, say it to her face, don't be an idiot and get Mum to say it!" And she went all red and said "Ahh ohh yeah OK..."

Now it pissed me off to the point that I'd actually like to just put him into daycare now but if I do that's going to rock the fucking Japanese poker face cunting family boat and I'd never live it down so I think I just have to suck it up and pay my extra ￥20,000 a month with a fake smile on my face.

Oh and before anyone tells me what a bitch I'm being because it's not her responsibility or duty to look after my kids, I know, that's why I'm paying. And if anyone thinks I'm holding her back with her family obligations don't even go there because if you knew her you'd realise that this is the ONLY "job" she's ever had and if she had any prospects of wanting to get a real life I'd have him in day care in a second. Actually, strike that, feel free to call me a bitch, maybe my sense of reality is skewed... All opinions on the topic welcome anyway!

One thing I've definitely realised, money and this fucking family definitely don't mix!

Men and MIL

I'm currently watching every episode of the HBO series 'Six feet under'. If you didn't watch it I suggest you do, I don't like TV that much but I loved Six feet under. I love the characters, the weirdness, the thought-provoking shit, the creepiness and the rawness. It's a little dangerous though, watching it makes me kind of not give a fuck about things, which is even more dangerous somewhere like Japan where randomness and not giving a fuck-ness can see you branded a weirdo for life. Meh, I'll never fit in anyway I guess!

But this post isn't about me going mental and doing random shit, it's about my poor MIL. My mother-in-law is the one person out of my in-laws who I can not only tolerate, but love very much and depend on a great deal. She's awesome in so many ways and it really makes me sad that she's been with so many cuntish men in her life, but then again from what I can tell most men are cunts at some point in their lives (whether they admit to it or not) so her chances were pretty high.

Let's re-cap her man list:

Ryota's dad- Nice enough but slut of the century and general arse when he wants to be

Mr R- Ripped her off of a massive amount of money then dumped her.

Mr S- Was married and flat out told her they could be lovers but he would never be able to leave his wife because she'd clean him out.

And then we have Mr N. The most recent boyfriend and generally a nice guy, but he's depressed and got so many mental issues going on it was just doomed from the beginning.
So they met about 5 years ago and were dating for about 2 years, he lives about 3 hours from us so they were doing semi-long distance because his elderly father lived with him and we have Grandma with us. When I married Ryota they were still dating and he actually gave me a pretty massive cash present to get the school started (he's pretty loaded, not that that takes away the kindness of the gesture at all, just sayin'...). He seems completely normal to the untrained eye, but actually he was very jealous and weird about travelling. He doesn't like travelling and he didn't want MIL to go anywhere overseas, he wanted her to go with him on trips around Japan. Why I'm not sure but that's just the way it was.

So after he gave me a wad of cash they pretty much split up straight away, because he was going through depression and didn't want to burden anyone and cut off all contact. But MIL rarely saw him anyway and to be honest I think she was kind of glad. Fast-forward 3 years and I was literally in the middle of giving birth to Bailey, when I asked her for some gossip to take my mind of the pain and she comes out with, "Well actually, I think N and I are getting back together... and getting married.." This was a total fucking shock because I hadn't heard his name for so long but apparently they had been talking and he was on depression meds so he was normal.

So after Bailey was born he started coming around again, helped out at the school's Halloween party and would stay some weekends. Obviously MIL knew he wasn't totally right in the head but she told me she was worried about growing old alone and more importantly, poor. Not so romantic but I can't blame her, which is why I'm already squirrelling away my own personal (secret) retirement fund in case some fucker of a man wants to fuck me over and leave me out in the cold.

Anyway, things were going well for them, and then I went to Australia for Chrissy and MIL and SIL decide to go to Hawaii for 5 days. Totally reasonable I think, mother and daughter going to Hawaii for a few days. She asked her boyfriend is it was OK which I thought was fucking ridiculous in itself but she's quite polite and his response was a kind of deadpan "OK."

So MIL was at the airport and he sent her an email saying "You're going to do whatever you want with your life, so I hope you're happy..." What the fuck is with men and their fucking mental issues fucking up everything around them!? It makes me so fucking angry!! But my MIL is awesome, so she turned off her phone and hopped on the plane. Thank God too, I would have lost so much respect for her had she not gone because of him.

So he didn't call her and was really cold when she got back and she kind of saw how mental he actually is, which is so good because had she married him it would have been too late. Although they were supposed to get married on her birthday in March and they had rings and everything. SIL and  have decided to take her to Kobe for an over-priced yet amazing lunch and shopping day for her birthday, because no matter how mental the guy is, you're bound to be a bit down on the day that was supposed to be your wedding day.

Men just fucking piss me off sometimes, they are giving me very little reason to see why we need them. So many useless fuckers out there, just give me the sperm and get me out, please!

Veiled

Do you ever get the feeling that every fucker in this place has something to hide??

It could be good or bad but I don't think I've ever met a Japanese person who I've made an opinion (OK judgement, let's be realistic) on and then not to have it totally fucking change in one way or another. I don't even know if this is a good thing or a bad thing, but it's just tiring at times!

I keep finding little things out about people that I just had no idea because they were hiding it for some reason. The reasons are many and varied too, embarrassed, ashamed, humble, "polite." They go on and on.

Or nothing is talked about openly?? My MIL has broken up with her boyfriend (who she's supposed to be marrying in March) because she went to Hawaii. Not because she went without him, just because she went. Fucking crazy cunt, she's dodged a bullet by breaking up with him in my opinion, but she hasn't discussed this openly with anyone in her family apart from me (because apparently gaijin are easy to talk to?? but I suspect more because I ask lots of fucking nosey questions...). All her family are relying on me for the goss because nobody wants to bring it up with her...? Craziness!!

Maybe gaijin really are easier for Japanese peeps to open up to, I had a lady in tears the other day because I told her we should strictly try to stay to talking in English if she wants to improve and she spilled her guts that she can't tell anyone else her secrets so she tells me and doesn't really care if she can speak English, she just wants to get it off her chest... I gotta start charging more, like psychiatrist fees more!

Right, back to work!

Fatting in

I once had a hilarious conversation with one of my very good friends at home, it was before I was getting a tattoo and I was (as usual) going through all the irrational fears I prattle on with when I'm nervous...

Her: Don't worry, you'll be fine!!

Me: What if the needle goes in too far and pierces an organ!!??

Her: Seriously Corinne, never gunna happen!

Me: What if I get some kind of virus from a contaminated needle!?

Her: They are VERY clean, I had all my tattoos there remember??

Me: OK, but what if I don't fit on that skinny little bench, my arse is huge!!!

Her: Ummm I fat on it, you'll be fine!

The laughter helped me relax, it was awesome.

On only a slightly related note, by going home for Christmas, I've managed to feel even more like a fish out of water than ever, woohoo!!!

I didn't fit in at home, actually I fat right in, I didn't feel too bad about being so hideously fat with all the other chubbiness around me, but I didn't feel as if I was "home." Well, not entirely true, when it came to my family and friends, totally at home. But I was doing insane things like exclaiming how big my friend's baby's eyes were, craving rice, tut tutting at couples kissing in public, and not enjoying waking up whenever I wanted only to laze around the pool all day. I was yearning for a routine, a schedule!? I've turned fucking Japanese!!!

Which would be fine, except that I don't fucking fit in enough in Japan either. I never will, accepted it. Over it. But where does that leave me?? Would I get used to life at home if I went back?? Or would I always want to come back to Japan?? It was all quite confusing but I was quite happy to get back to my routine, and the customer service in Japan. Not so much to the freezing cold weather and realisation that no matter how long I stay here, I'll never be totally at home here either.

Too much life changing thinking going on for a Saturday morning though, must get back to working, which is going towards my goal of being totally debt-free by 2015. I can do it, I just have to work my arse off and not bitch and moan too much and I'll have my school, my house and any other stray loans paid off. I would have loved to have done it before I was 30, but with that horror lurking this year I just have to face that it will be 2015, my original goal was to have bought a property by 30 anyway so I got that far.

Other new year resolutions this year??

*Don't get pregnant!

*Lose 25kg

*Chill the fuck out a bit

*Under no circumstances get fucking pregnant!!

*Climb mount Fuji, I've lived here 8 years, it has to be done.

*Turn 30 with grace and dignity. (HA! Not going to happen, drunken messy grace, possibly...)

Chillin'

Ok, now that the school has closed for the year I have actually started to relax a bit!

Christmas was nice this year, of course because I was with my family, but mainly because I was in a country that really embraces Christmas, not just KFC and overly sweet cake. Japan is different and in some ways good, but there's nothing like Chrissy at home for me.
I drank loads of booze, ate too much and stayed Christmas night at a nice hotel with my sister watching movies and doing nothing, it was lovely. I went shopping today and picked up some bargains; jeans, shoes, cosmetics, so nice to get everything I want whenever I want!

The boys and I are just settling into life here, and when we do it will be time to go back to Japan, it's not gunna be fun... I've also been running along the beach everyday and realizing how much I miss living near the beach. I really have to try and hatch a plan to move back here, the pubs alone are worth it!

I'm not really missing Ryota, I am not liking being a single parent however and can't wait to get back to work to get a break from the kids!

Ok, mum just called us for dinner ( LOVE not being the cook!!!) so I'll leave you with a few pics, the first one is of me right now, just home from a run and totally relaxed!

Hiatus!

Ooooooo look who went on a blogging strike! I can't even say its because I was busy, because I've been in summery Australia since Monday. Although am only now settling into life away from my Japan routines. I'm here with the two kids too so single parenting is kinda funny to get used to as well!

I feel kind of weird leaving the school, C is taking over classes for me and I feel lost without going to the school every day!

I'm sure Ryota is enjoying the kid-free peace at home but I sure am enjoying being back home, reading shit and actually understanding all of it, eating Greek food for dinner when it was a toss up of Greek, Lebanese, Mexican or Thai and catching up with old friends.

Actually I just spent the whole day with my ex-boyfriend's family. I love them like my own and despite the break-up always felt they were still 'my' family. May be weird... Is it weird...? I think I'm more comfortable with them than I ever will be around Ryota's family which is a shame.

One thing I forgot about home in December is how NOT relaxing the Christmas season is! Christmas shopping in IN-SANE! I've done most of it now but I take the fact that shops never get too crazy around Chrissy time in Japan for granted. Also feeling the bad service, or the fact that the service is so good in Japan. People just can't be bothered to serve you here, shocking.

Ash is loving the fact that he can run around on actual grass with his shoes off, the nature, pool at home, being spoilt rotten... Good for him all round really. Looking forward to making Christmas an actual event for him and leaving stuff out for Santa and the reindeer, should be fun.

Right, I'm off to wrap some pressies, it will definitely be a new uear's resolution to blog more in 2013!!!!!

I will try to post again before Chrissy but if I don't, merry Christmas to all in Japan and around the world who are still bothering to check in here!




- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Since I last posted...

In no particular order...

*President Obama got re-elected. I'm not American and not particularly political, but I like Mr Obama, not because he can save the world or anything, just because he seems like a nice guy. Plus Hollywood loves him, if brainwashing from the U.S of A has taught me anything, it's go with Jay-Z!

*I turned 29. Not 30. Breathe. Not 30. No actually I don't give a fuck about getting older, I figure it only gets better. Birthday was good. Got some nice pressies, went out for a steak, can't ask for more than that!

*I gained another pussy. As in cat that is. Our little moo-chan has a brother it appears. They do everything together and it was impossible to say yes to one and no to another. So now a grand total of 3 kitty cats; Whisky-chan, Moo-chan and Fuu-chan. That's Fuu as in Fugu, not fuck for you non-Japanese speakers too!

*My baby is no longer a baby... he's a rolling, toothy little boy and that scares me more than getting older does!

*I've hatched a one-year escape plan from my marriage if need be. That's a post for another day though.

*I got a comment on one of my posts that managed to really piss me off:

"I also don't understand why u as mother don't go to yr kids sport festival. u live with a j family, have a j husband and u live in j.so, u could at least adopt to the basic j family behavior."

As much as this made me very fucking angry, (I'm a little too defensive perhaps) I'm as always, grateful for any comments and input, as different to my opinion as they may be.

Let me just defend myself by saying I did go to the final rehearsal which is exactly the same thing. And there was one reason and one reason only I didn't go, it wasn't to be a rebellious little gaijin baby, it was because- I WORK. I wasn't just slacking off at home! Anyway, the comment triggered a whole new set of fears that I'm ruining my children by working when they're so young. Women really are fucked every way on this I feel.

*I'm sure there has been some other drama but I can't really think of anything else at the moment, I'll leave you with a pic of SIL's wall shrine to the late dog...