Since I can remember, I've had issues with my weight. OK let's cut the shite and tell it how it really is; ever since I've been old enough to scoff tim tams behind the pantry door I've been a lazy, lard-arsed, tub.
And I know people tell you that how big you are shouldn't affect you if you're comfortable with yourself and that being skinny isn't the key to happiness blah.. blah.. blah. Bullshit, for me, being skinni(er than my usual whale-like self) solves most to all of my problems and makes me feel better. Much better. Without sounding too 'pro-ana' or anything, I personally am a much happier camper when I'm not so much of a lard-arse. I actually envy those people who are happy with being overweight.
I think this mentality comes from my dad, he's what we call a 'fatophile,' he judges people if they're fat. He thinks they're lazy, and not as intelligent as other people. Of course easy for him with his super speedy metabolism and all. I don't think that at all, but it may have had some effect on me as a child, I'm banking all these things for when I'm crazy enough for therapy. My mum and sister are also consistent yo-yo dieters too so I was bound to have issues.
Here are a few photos from when I was pretty big, I may have been bigger in Australia but I only have photos from in Japan, I think I'm probably over 100kgs here!
About 2 years ago I decided to actually do something to make my life better and lose a shitload of weight. This was how my days were:
6am- Run/Jog/Walk/Bike for an hour. Big breakfast.
9am-5pm- Work. No lunch.
6pm- 1 hour run.
8pm- Sit-ups/ weight training/ Some form of resistance training.
I also drank nothing but green tea, oolong tea or water.
This was incredibly boring but it worked, and I got to my happy place, 77kg. It's not thin by any means but it was good for me, I'm tall so 77kg was great for me.
It was great. All going to plan. Losing weight, feeling healthy... Then I got preggers! Which is good too, but basically made me put back on a ton of weight and totally lose my losing mojo.
I gained at least 20kg when preggers, I tried to keep the jogging up but my friends told me I was killing my unborn child with all the jiggling (until they saw the Sex and the city movie and decided if Charlotte could run then so could I). But by that time I was tired all the time and just couldn't be arsed jogging. I did try preggo yoga but it wasn't very strenuous and the doctor told me my I'd done too many kegel exercises while I was giving birth! WTF?!
Anyway, not sure of the final weigh-in figure because thankfully Australian doctors don't weigh you at preggo check-ups unlike my Japanese clinic where they paraded me out to the weighing machine which printed out my weight so I couldn't even fib and knock off a few kilos, bastards! But I know it was close to or over the 100kg mark (despite consistent bollocking from J-Docs).
I lost a bit due to mummy/ Japan stress when I got back and am now at 86kgs.
Phew, that took balls! I'm one of those 'never tell your weight' people but fuck it, if I'm going to get anywhere I need to get it out there!
I'm aiming for my happy place 77kg but really would like to be 70kg, nice round number. 80 is a little too round and 60 is a little too bony, although wouldn't knock it back! So giving it a crack! let's see how I go...
Around the time of my happy place!
EDIT: Ryota saw this post and told me he hates skinny Japanese bony girls and that he loves my squidgy bits. Awwww. He also told me I look a little like a rat in my happy place picture!!! God bless him.
WTF is with all the comment word verification craziness?? I want one that says 'fatcow' when I leave a comment...