I've never cheated in a relationship before, not because I have some strong moral stance on the issue of cheating, well, maybe I used to but I find my moral fibre seems to be stretched very thin these days...
But just because if I ever was going to cheat I think I would have broken up with them first. The same with my partner cheating on me, if I found out that Ryota was cheating I'd probably say: "Bummer..." or something similar and actually be thinking 'Fuck it, this is going to be a lot of paperwork...' Plus who would want to be a single parent, I have a hard enough time when there's two of us, I'd go bonkers if I was on my own. So yeah, for those reasons, I'd hope he wouldn't cheat on me, and depending on my quality of life at the time, I may just turn a blind eye to it and go find my own fuck buddy.
I've heard and seen first hand some horror stories of jealous Japanese girls going absolutely mental at the slightest hint that their boyfriend may be cheating on them. They're lovely stories to hear, especially from your foreign friends, when you can buy them a beer and say "Should have stuck with us foreign women mate!" I once met a friend for lunch who showed me his back and stomach absolutely covered in scratch marks because his Japanese girl found a mail in his phone that made her think he was cheating, (he wasn't) and she then tried to jump out the window after he told her she was an absolute jealous psycho. Another friend tried to break up with his girlfriend and she grabbed a golf club from his genkan and started to beat him around the head with it in a psychotic rage. I had a friend have to stay with me for a week because his long-term girlfriend had found a mail in English (she didn't speak a word) and thought it must have been a cheating mail, she'd chased him out of the apartment with a kitchen knife and had also threatened to jump off the balcony in psycho-J-girl-style. These are all women who I've met, two I'm friends with. Tiny, cute, harmless-looking Japanese girls who come up to my knee caps who totally fuck you up if they think you're cheating on them.
So J-girl stories don't surprise me, I've heard a lot. But I was more than a little surprised when recently I discovered my own sister has been having cheating issues of her own and had released her inner J-girl on her boyfriend. I got a mail from her a few weeks ago in the middle of the night saying that she hated men and wanted to run away to Japan. Hmmmm... My sister and I are close enough but we don't often inform each other of the juicy details of each other's lives, we just forget or are too lazy to email. So I knew that this must be serious. I sent back supportive sister comments and knew it was too raw to ask her what had happened and decided to get the gossip from my dad, who was bound to dish, as opposed to my mum who would surely add boring details or get distracted from the juicy details by asking to blow kisses at Ashton.
So Dad dished, and it turns out that silly boyfriend didn't erase his history on his computer, the very first rule of porn or dating site surfing, even I know that! My sister then found he'd been looking at dating sites and had actually made a profile. I also discovered that when she'd found out she woke the poor bloke up by smashing their dinnerware collection at the wall, with fragments getting him in the head. Very J-girlesque! At least she didn't threaten any balcony jumping, but still...
I heard her reaction before his crime and was sure she must have found him in bed with a skanky hoe, but I was like, "Is that all?? He didn't actually physically fuck anything??" My dad was a bit taken aback by my blunt question, but replied, "No, not as far as we can tell..."
To me, this isn't cheating. It could be curiosity, there are all sorts of Internet ads on sites I frequent daily with hot Asian girls in skimpy bikinis saying 'Want to meet her tonight??' in fun, suggestive fonts. Fuck I'm only about 15% lesbian and I want to fuck the hot Asian girl!!
Or what if he was just doing it for a laugh, a bit of fun??
After the situation had settled down and she'd moved back in with him after he promised to never think about touching a keyboard ever again and no doubt having his cock under lock and key for a week or so, I put this question forward to her, and she point blank refused to agree with me, she thinks intent is cheating, Internet intent or not. We totally disagree but I guess it's a very personal thing. It worries me though, it's like those catholic school girls who aren't allowed any freedom, then once they finish school they go crazy giving every boy in sight blow jobs and have Internet screen names like "Gang_bang_slut_69" (An actual screen name of mine- don't ask...) Surely the boyfriend will feel restricted from now on and actually go and cheat some time in the future?
So I'm asking you all for your opinions-
Have you ever cheated??
Have you ever been cheated on??
What constitutes cheating??
Has a J-girl ever threatened to jump off your balcony??