Monday 12 July 2010

So yeah, he wants a freakin...


The twat-meister, AKA Ryota has told me that he can't live without a new surfboard. Now, despite being Australian, I don't get the surfing thing (probably because I can't do it), but anyone I know who surfs is seriously like a junkie, they just can't stop the urge to surf. I don't get it, but I guess I can imagine what it's like...? Yeah, not really. Anyone who surfs, can you explain it to me??

Not only does he want a new board, he wants a board that costs roughly the same amount as a ticket back home for me. Hmmmm, wonder which one I'll end up forking out for...
And not only is this board bastard expensive, he also has 2, yes 2! perfectly good (according to me) surfboards at home. What the fuck!?

He totally reverse psychology-ised my arse when he asked me about it, setting it up with "Errr I don't want to ask you, because I know you'll tell me to fuck off..." So then I couldn't actually tell him to fuck off so said "Of course you can buy a surfboard for a ridiculous amount of money when you already have two collecting dust. Darling. Pumpkin. Sweet pea!" all through gritted teeth.
But fuck it, who am I to tell him how to spend his hard earned cash anyway, really. He doesn't have many hobbies, smoking is the only one that really pisses me off. He doesn't drink/ go out/ gamble, perhaps I should just let him buy the bastard thing. Or perhaps... I should give him an incentive to stop smoking by saying he gets the new surfboard when he quits!? Ooooo I like that one, although a twice weekly blow job clause may have to be thrown in if I actually want the deal to work...

But enough about blow jobs, must get back to work!


  1. ah..(knowing smile)..I get it cos I love being in the water too..also get it cos hub is always planning on the next board he is gonna buy..since A was born I put a cap on one a year. Admittedly, he has been buying them from Oz (while we are there or has them shipped) and is so much cheaper than buying them in Japan and buying imports. That is hubs main hobby, he doesn`t smoke, drink (anymore) and I can`t deny him the one thing he loves. So at times I get miffed as why he needs another board so soon, but he doesn`t spend money on anything else so... (and if it gets you guys down here I`m all for it ;P)

  2. Reminds me of the time my husband paid Y80,000 for......a complete set of some rakugo master's CDs! It's true that he listened them for years afterward, and they kept him out of trouble for many happy hours, but at the time, they didn't seem like a great investment, y'know?

  3. ooooh, stop smoking for a surfboard - that could work even minus the blow-jobs, if he wants a new one that much. Can you get him to e-bay his two he already has or do surfers have different boards for different days... ???

  4. I'm Californian and I never got the whole surfing thing. Grew up on the beach, too. I was more interested in tanning. Haha. People here get really gnarly about it. It's practically a drug.

    I think you should use the "stop smoking and..." incentive.

  5. I can surf. Not real well. But I can stand up and stay standing for short periods of time! I can understand why people could get addicted. Haven`t done it in years though. I say tell him to sell the two boards he has on yahoo auction then put that money towards his new one. Tell him you just don`t have the space for ANOTHER board.

    I agree make a deal about the smoking! Shun was supposed to quit when Noah was born but I know he still smokes at work. But he was around all weekend and didn`t smoke while he was home. He is too scared I will find his cigerettes if he brings them home!!

    When Shun wanted a new computer I told him he could do it when his bonus came in if I got the remainder to spend on whatever I wanted. So that is what we did.

    I trade 3 x 30 minute massages for a blow job. It works for us!

  6. Smokin or surfin......Up to him.You have a great deal.Go Girl!

    Have to mention tho',TG he still tells you about his "future" buys in advance.I have many a friend(and hell yes,I am included here) who has come home to a "new toy".In my case it was a fucking rotary blady grass cutter.Cost half a trip back to the UK.Arghhh fuckity fuck indeed;)

  7. I think asking him to quit smoking is a fair trade for a new surf board even though he already has 2 (I like Katy's ebay idea too)! My hub will buy watch after watch even though he already has five. I had to talk him out of a $5000 watch. $5000!!! I threatened not to marry him :P that did the trick. lol

    Sometimes hubs need a little reigning in! Seriously, use this to your advantage. He'll probably be so gobsmacked that said yes that he'll agree to whatever you want :) If he balks, you can always say quitting smoking will make surfing easier because he'll be healthier :P

  8. I say let him get it no strings attached because later you can throw it back in his face when you want something yourself. I've been working that angle for years and years. I always get the better end of the deal eventually.

  9. Ooh.. Sherry has a good angle! :-)
    I think your "terms" sound fair though, fingers crossed he chooses the surfboard over smoking!